no power in the ‘verse can stop me
headcanon: Bucky Barnes + Bucky Bears
Bucky doesn’t see the big fuss, really. They didn’t even get the costume right. As if he’d wear little sky-blue booty shorts in war with tights and thigh-high boots.
"I think they’re cute," Steve says, smiling as he picked one off of the stand.
"Don’t buy that." Bucky says, snatching it out of his hand. Steve just picks up another one.
"You used to collect Captain America comic books back in the day," Steve points out.
"That’s different." Bucky sniffs. "Those were a riot. This is character assassination.”
Steve laughs. “Maybe if we gave him a little bottle of bourbon and a tiny sniper rifle?”
He finds one on Natasha’s bed.
"I can explain." She says, walking in to find him staring at it. He turns to look at her and she grins. "Actually, there’s nothing to explain. I’ve just always wanted to say that."
"I feel like you’re stepping out on me," Bucky says, picking up the bear. It even smells like Natasha, like it had been snuggled against her neck night after night while Bucky was mucking through the swamps of Panatal. He was jealous.
"That’s such an adorable accusation I’m not even going to get angry at you," Natasha says, plugging in her hair straightener and fixing her makeup in the mirror as it heats up.
Bucky squeezes the bear as hard as he can, making its little glass eyes bug out of the domino mask.
"Uh huh," Sam says unsympathetically, slurping on his three berry smoothie. "Yeah talk to me when Falcon Bear gets so popular that Natasha cuddles one to sleep every night. Then I’ll cry with you."
"That would be weird, though." Bucky says, stirring his own strawberry banana smoothie. "A bear with wings?"
"A Falcon bear."
"But it would be a bear, but also a bird?"
"No, it would be a bear in a Falcon suit-" Sam smacked Bucky on the arm as Bucky started cracking up.
For Christmas, Bucky buys a plain bear and digs out an old leather jacket of his that had gotten torn up on a mission. Painstakingly, he sews a little leather Falcon harness, complete with a full set of wings painted silver. And little goggles to boot.
It looks so good that he makes a little Black Widow bear too, choosing a bear with reddish-colored fur and scouring the internet for weeks to find an hourglass charm he can make into the belt buckle.
Captain America already had a bear, though it had never attained the popularity of Bucky Bear. So Bucky makes a Steve bear. Complete with a gingham shirt tucked into khaki pants, and an artfully rumpled trench coat. In one paw it held a falsified army recruitment form.
"Wow, that’s so thoughtful," Clint says, when he saw them. "Way to blow all of us out of the water forever, you douchebag."
"Oh these aren’t gifts," Bucky says lightly, packing them in boxes. "These are revenge.”
Falcon, Black Widow and preserum Steve Rogers bears hit the stores a month before Christmas, and quickly become the best selling toys of 2014, quickly outstripping the classic Bucky Bear, who most modern children could no longer associate with The Avengers.
"Really?" Steve demands, "A falsified army recruitment form?"
"I think it’s cute," Bucky laughs, eyeing the shelves and shelves of bears. "A riot.”
If you don’t keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to.
#i feel like tilda is everyone’s earth mother #someone approaches her and she’s all did you try that stress relieving oatmeal and eucalyptus body scrub i was talking about #you had to mix it in a clay pot remember #good that’s good i thought your aura seemed lighter #even people she doesn’t know she’s like i’m sensing unwellness what can i do tell me what i can do
Title: The Safety Dance
Artist:Men Without Hats
Played 3,308 times
samwise gamgee the kitty cat